Back on Track

After yesterday's frightening experience, I was determined to get a day under my belt which restored my confidence in my control, and I'm happy to say that I did. I ate between 1400-1500 calories, which was a bit below my target of 1600 or so. I didn't eat less as compensation for the strange binge eating episode, but rather because I was very wary of acting on my hunger all day and delayed eating for every meal after breakfast. I probably ate lunch 90 minutes later than usual, and dinner about two and a half hours later than usual because I felt really weird about food in general all day.

I have asked my husband to inquire about my food progress every day until I ask him to stop. This is, in part, to help me feel more secure and accountable, but it will also engage him in my life to a larger extent. He said he will do as I ask (and he did so yesterday both at lunch time and when he got home from work), but he has confidence that I will be able to keep my control. He also told me that he feels bad about whatever part he played in the situation, but I reassured him that he was in no way responsible.

One of the interesting aspects of having one "bad day" (and I mean from the psychological point of view, not from the "I ate bad food viewpoint") is that generally all it takes to make you feel better is a "good day" (a day in control) to restore your faith in your ability to carry on. I feel much better today than yesterday, though I think I'll feel even better tomorrow with a few "good days" under my belt.